How to Have a Happy Relationship: 6 Steps To Making Your Woman Happy

how to have a happy relationship

Greetings DUNIA readers! I thank you for your support and the overwhelmingly positive response to my first article: 5 Ways to Win Your Partner’s Heart.  It has led me down this path to writing a follow-up article inspired by several requests especially from Bro. Tazoh Venland Teke who commented “We men will need some key advice on how to keep women or make them loyal and happy!”  This reminded me that men are also looking for loving, faithful and happy relationships.

Let’s not forget that great relationships are not stumbled upon. Great relationships often start from “scratch” and built up over time.  I want to write to the Dunia men about the “foundation” or more specifically those fundamentals used in constructing a fulfilling relationship. See, women are not necessarily complicated, so, I humbly offer this advice to the men, so that you can give her a gift that she will treasure forever. So brothers, let’s take a step back and begin to master the following tips that will help set solid foundations for happy relationships, whether you are single or committed; looking or already in a relationship.

1. Exercise Patience in building a solid Foundation.

The most important element of any relationship is its foundation. A foundation is built in a certain way, composed of various sub-elements. The way to build is simply with patience.  See? Not complicated but admittedly difficult; yet critical to be applied at all times. In the following points, we will go into the details about these sub-elements that are necessary when patiently building a long-term, fulfilling relationship. Remember you will only get out what you put in, expect nothing more, and accept nothing less.

2. Compassion: Loving her as your own self.

Apply the golden rule by treating her as you would like to be treated.  When you truly love someone, your happiness is directly tied to the one you love. Therefore, you cannot afford to see or put effort into making her angry, sad, or guilty because it affects your whole being. Find every opportunity to make her smile, show how much you love her, carefully plan nice surprises for her, encourage her and make her feel like she is a priority in your life.

3. Communication: Share, be open and respect her.

Engage in a deep, on-going discussion that defines and establishes your relationship. Questions that should be asked and answered honestly include but are not limited to; what do you believe in, what do you expect from this relationship, what are you looking for in one, do you want children, what are your fears, what are some of the things in your past that I should know? Establishing effective communication lines helps a couple to be prepared to respond to challenges as the relationship progresses. Remember that effective communication involves at least as much listening as talking. When it comes to talking, she may know you love her but at times she still wants to hear it; always remind her about how much you “love those beautiful eyes” etc to make her feel good. Noticing the very little things she does may make her want to do more. Holding her hand in public when she least expects it or giving her a kiss on the cheek amongst friends goes a long way in instilling in her that confidence and higher sense of self-esteem through your non-verbal communication to the world. While apart, say only good things about her; when you talk negatively about your woman, it is a reflection on you. Choose to believe in your woman, choose to respond positively to that which concerns her, choose to want the best for her – when you do, you will enjoy the fruits. The majority of women are ‘talkers’ and good communicators. By understanding this, you can use the power of communication to take your relationship places.

4. Be there: Give her every reason to Trust.

From patience, compassion and communication, trust naturally grows. I have watched my guy friends complain about their women but interestingly, what I noticed is that these same guys are never really there for their women – they are spending most of their time hanging out with their friends sharing private details about her and worst of all, listening to gossip about her.  Guys, you ought to realize that you are not free of mistakes either, and no one is perfect. Refrain from ‘fighting’ with your woman about things in her past. Yes, women ought to understand your need for freedom or ‘space’, but that does not mean you should hang out in bars at every chance or jump from one woman to next. Dating several women doesn’t make you a strong man. Instead, it exposes weaknesses and insecurities, even in the very eyes of those you are trying to impress. The solutions to relationship problems are never found in the arms of another woman. Instead, you are hurting your loved one and in turn hurting yourself. Women want to believe that you will defend their honor, even when they are not there.

5. Humility: Saying sorry first.

Being able to apologize first is a true sign of humility. Most of the time, men demand that they be recognized and respected as the head of the household, however when it comes to the most crucial point of demonstrating this, they often fall short. Can you prove that you are the head of household by saying sorry first?

Putting your wants and needs to the side during a crisis and telling her that you are sorry (even when you are right) and how much you love her will melt her heart. I don’t know any woman who will not appreciate this, even if they don’t openly tell you so. Therefore calming the storm in your house should be your goal as the head of household.  Women want to see that their man can get down like that too! But do not just say it, mean it!

6. Servitude: Support her! A true king is one who serves

Break the myth that being ‘the man’ equals being the boss. This is a love relationship, which implies that both partners seek to find out what works for their union. In the modern world, the woman is no longer limited to the kitchen, the children and/or the household chores. Always work to be the provider, however, if the woman is also working, support by helping with the children, cleaning, laundry, etc. The woman who is in the role of the financial provider is proud of the humble man who can thrive in this role. This presupposes that the couple has built a foundation so solid that they have a working plan that is not distorted or broken by their environment or by any other culture.

Patience, compassion, communication, trust, humility and service my Dunia brothers. I humbly urge you to research, learn about and practice each of these foundational principles independently. Learn them and apply them to your life. Not only will it strengthen existing relationships and new relationships, but are applicable to all other areas of your life.

Please leave your feedback and questions so that together we can build relationships, one at a time.

What is a woman's favorite gift?

  • Outings (40%)
  • Flowers (38%)
  • Money (21%)
  • Lingerie (2%)
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