A DUNIA Magazine article
Romance in relationships should not only be reserved for special days such as Valentine’s day. It takes effort to keep a relationship happy and vibrant. “Keeping romance alive requires time, attention and the willingness to start fresh over and over, to learn how to constantly reconnect. There is nothing as important as taking time to re-connect and re-kindle the romance you’ve been longing for,” says Dr Brenda Shoshanna, New York based psychologist and author.
So how do we keep up with life, yet still maintain happy and romantic relationships?
- Find at least one form of activity you can do together, for example cooking, exercise, karaoke, etc. Commit to this activity regardless of how busy or tight your schedule is.
- Work on a few projects together, ranging from fixing things around the house and remodeling the home, to bigger family projects that will help foster feelings of accomplishment.
- Be open with your feelings and listen to each other… not to criticize, but to understand. Meeting your spouse’s emotional needs is a very important part of keeping the romance alive. Experts advise that great sex doesn’t necessarily help emotional problems disappear, but it is good communication that is vital for long-term fulfillment sexually and in other aspects of the relationship.
- Plan a weekend retreat at least twice a year. Between those, celebrate your love by planning first-class surprise romantic evenings all for your partner. Spending quality time together keeps you connected.
- Don’t forget to recall the fun you had together before marriage and share stories and photos of those times with the kids. This keeps the wedding bells ringing even after several years.
- Understanding the fundamental differences between men and women helps dispel unpleasant feelings. For example, research shows that women tend to cry five times more often than men (especially when no one’s watching); men normally reach their sexual peak at around 20-years of age, while women do so at 35; women tend to perceive emotions more than men, … and women seem to be a little bit more complicated and high maintenance (as some men claim… lol). Is it any wonder the bible advises in Ephesians 5:33, “However, each one of you [men] also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband“. Appreciating and accepting the differences in each other is a real sign of unconditional love
- Hold hands, snuggle in front of the fireplace, flirt with each other, be spontaneous and laugh together. These warm feelings keep the relationship warm and grows the love.
- Making decisions together shows that you trust each other’s judgment. This makes partners feel secure, loved and trusted… and keeps the romance alive.
We hope that these nuggets help keep you close to that special someone in your life.
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