Fussy Imane giving advice on how to be ‘satisfied’!
By Imane Fawzy Nofal
How frequently do you find yourself feeling grumpy for no reason – experiencing meltdowns, screaming and yelling over trivialities just to let out the passive energy inside you? How many times have you attributed your bad mood to hormonal changes especially such female stuff like PMS (Premenstrual syndrome)? I am sure most women can relate.
Well, I must admit, I believe myself to be one of the fussiest human beings on earth. One moment I may be over the moon feeling life is great, and the next, cursing and feeling miserable. No exaggeration. I do not like feeling this way; I wish I was more stable and normal.
Some time ago, I realized I had to get a grip on this aspect of my life; I decided to find a way to attain a state of tranquility and peacefulness in my being. I had to let go of always “wanting” to be happy, and learn to be satisfied in the first place. That would be the first psychological adjustment.
Here are some steps I outlined towards finding satisfaction:
- 1. Define who I am
- 2. Identify the negative aspects of my life and either tweak them or accept them
- 3. Make my days into ‘quality’ time
- 4. Surround myself with people who lift me up
- 5. Block out people’s talk
- 6. Put future plans in place
- 7. Have hope that God will grant the things I wish for, even if delayed
In order to apply these to my life: I had to stand back and look in on my life. I started by defining myself. I am a married woman, 27 years old, not very pretty but good looking, with twins whom I didn’t wish for but glad and grateful God forced them on me … etc.
Then, after defining myself, I made a point of spending good quality time with important persons in my daily sphere: ‘husband’, ‘twins’ and ‘myself’. The key word is ‘QUALITY’. When we engage in valuable activities with those close to us, our days go from being ‘void’ and ‘boring’ to ‘merry’ and ‘positive’.
Whenever I read a story with my kids, I feel satisfied as a mother. Whenever I carry out a discussion with my husband without ending up in an argument, I feel satisfied about my position as a wife. Whenever I write something that I like and get published I feel satisfied about my position as me.
Now on to the cultural Eastern aspect that affects us all: people. People can have a tremendous effect on us. They have a way of trying to make themselves relevant when they really aren’t; they could help one prosper and they sure could break us if we let them. Unfortunately, most people appoint themselves as judges of one’s actions and interfere in the worst ways possible. Personally, I try to engage myself in groups that understand what ‘cooperation’ and ‘positive attitude’ mean. When I am in a situation where I have to hear ‘silly talk’ or protect my space from intrusion, I use my deaf ear. I hear the talk and let it go with the wind. Another strategy I use to let out the anger I feel towards people is by invoking persons in my imagination and beating them up in every possible way. Sort of complicated but really works out …
Tell me, how do you handle feelings of irritability?
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Imane Fawzy Nofal is a translator, and mother of twin boys. She is an Egyptian who lives in Bahrain and blogs at Express It 2 Live It. Imane regularly shares her thoughts on human interactions and real life issues on DUNIA through her column Express it by Imane.
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