UNREALISTIC PRAYER REQUESTS: A Christmas Reflection On Giving and Receiving
Twitter: @Talktolia
“Before we open our mouths to make requests, God already has perfect gifts and plans to prosper us.”
Just because God is the commander in Chief of the entire universe, in charge of the personal, interpersonal and foreign policies of every creature, living, dead and yet to be born, doesn’t make Him available at the snap of a finger.
God doesn’t just jump in and provide a fish on a hook thrown by some wanton boy trying to catch his first fish to impress a new girlfriend convincing her that he would make a great father to their unborn-yet-to-be conceived out-of-wedlock baby. Now, that’s an unrealistic prayer.
Before you start asking me how I managed to get into God’s mind to know what prayers He’d answer and what He wouldn’t lose sleep over, I’d simply say, let’s get to the bottom of it and see how much we could agree. I’m sure by the end of this write-up someone somewhere in the world, reading this would surely identify with one or all of the scenarios of such prayers that either went unanswered because they were unrealistic or found themselves asking God to forgive them sometime later, for treating Him like a “genie in a bottle” that says YES to all requests. Granted God is more than any proverbial genie in a bottle, His standards place Him far higher than our human minds can perceive as well as far more superior over our personal indiscretions and indulgencies that only He can decide at any given point in time, what is best to give us.
ARE GOD’S GIFTS HARMFUL?
“So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him”, Luke 11:13 NLT.
As challenging as the process of giving gifts genuinely, wholeheartedly and generously could sometimes get, the process of receiving, accepting and appreciating gifts usually places the most burden on the receiver. If the gift does not meet certain expectations, doesn’t meet a particular need and doesn’t carry a certain value, chances are, the giver must have given in vain. As Christmas approaches lots of people are already planning on what to give as well as what they’d like to receive. The Christmas tradition especially in the Western world has not managed to bridge some of the gaps by creating possibilities for potential receivers to make known the kind of gifts they wish to receive from their givers. This makes for a redefinition of the term gift that naturally should have a strong surprise element as well as the excitement and satisfaction that accompanies the expected expression of gratitude. That notwithstanding, bringing God in the middle of all this totally alters the whole drama. He has plans for our lives right from the onset, and therefore at any given point in time, He knows what’s best, for “…I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” Jeremiah 29:11. Before we open our mouths to make requests, God already has perfect gifts and plans to prosper us.
How is that? Granted that God’s gifts or answered prayers are meant to bless our lives, let’s take a look at some unrealistic prayer requests we should not include in our Christmas wish list:
1. The Ultimatum Prayer: A couple after marriage gets a baby before their economic situation stabilizes and they ask God to give them a job in 30 days because they have to cater for the baby’s needs: “Father we were not yet ready for this baby but now that you have given us a child we pray that you grant us a better paying job ASAP to cater for this baby because we spent way too much at the wedding and we are still enjoying our honeymoon. What is the problem with this prayer? It’s very realistic technically, because the couple needs to cater for their baby, pay off bills and some credit card debts incurred during their wedding. The problem is they are giving God a deadline and that is more like an order than a plea. No offence to family planning gimmicks but if we agree that God gives us kids, then we must accept them and trust God to provide their needs. As we accept the gifts God gives us we must show gratitude and humility while waiting in faith believing that He has a plan even when we fail to make the perfect plans for our own lives. If God feeds the birds, the animals and dresses the plants what more of humans created in His image? (Matthew 6:25-34). Like every father, God also allows us some difficulties to teach us discipline but in every situation, He always works around it, for our own good. Romans 8:28
2. The Pushy Ingrate’s Prayer: at a gynecologist’s office, a woman finds out from her ultrasound results that she is expecting another baby girl. She falls on her knees in tears and prays: “father, turn this baby girl into a boy, or else my husband will be very angry at me for having a fifth girl. This was going to be our last try for a boy. God, your word says in Matthew 19:26, that all things are possible with you. This is your time to show me that you are God and not man. Please make this happen before I’m full term”. Yeah right! God has already created biological processes that determine every conception. The only abnormal situations that we pray against are illnesses, genetic defects that we must ban from our families and bloodlines at all cost. Illnesses as we know are the devil’s plans to disrupt the peace and joy of families. However offspring gender is not a divine problem. The chromosome production between a man and a woman determine the gender of a baby. And when that baby is conceived it’s a perfect gift from God with a plan already set in place for her or him. We shouldn’t and cannot ask God to replace the foetus of a baby girl with a baby boy because we fear our marriages may fall apart. That is one silly request that the couple still looking for a child will definitely not find funny at all.
3. The Blackmailer’s Prayer: instead of pouring out a truly repentant prayer, there are people who still believe they can play with God’s mind and make Him do stuff for them: Check out this prayer: “almighty father, if truly you are God, how come everyone in this neighbourhood is having a new car except me? If I steal a car, I’m sure you will forgive me because you are a forgiving God”. Seriously! I’m not God but I won’t answer such a prayer. He might succeed in his theft but he will have to serve time in Jail when caught, even if I forgive him for the sin.
4. The Reckless Glutton’s Prayer: Just like the blackmailer’s prayer, the glutton also tries to make God clean up their weight mess. “Dear God, I just can’t do without food even at odd hours of the night. I eat whatever my mouth loves to eat. But God, I don’t see any problem enjoying the beautiful things you have freely blessed me with. However, I am 100 pounds overweight and need your intervention. How could a blessing from your own provision become a curse to my health, God?” Hmmm! This one still puzzles me because there are lots of obese individuals around the world who do little or nothing about their weight and yet expect God to send an angel to suck up the fat from their systems while they continue to eat without control. We can’t expect God to cut the fat from our burger especially when we eat at midnight. We can’t expect God to replace bacon with cucumbers in our stomach after eating bacon. We can’t expect God to give us a free weight loss exercise while we are fast asleep on the couch. Yes He is God but we must also learn to take care of our bodies because they are the temple of the Holy Spirit. They are our bodies but we must decide on how to manage and keep them Holy and Healthy.
5. The Deaf Ear Daughter’s Prayer: Everyone knows the man is a playboy, he’s got kids in every city in the world yet he tells you he is serious with you. He has shown no signs of repentance, no signs that God has brought him to order yet you accept his ring, marry him and start praying after the marriage “God please, I know my husband has been a deadbeat all his life, he still flirts with girls when we go out, he still looks for excuses to hang out with his friends at late hours and I’m afraid he started drinking and smoking again. Lord, I need you to change him for a perfect husband so I can cease from worrying”. There’s no problem praying for our spouses to change. As a matter of fact, God welcomes prayers. The problem is that God also speaks to us before certain marriages but we give Him a deaf ear. We do not take time to go through marriage counselling, to determine if we are both clean before God as we say “I do”. The mistake women seldom make is the assumption that everything will take care of itself during the marriage and that the man will surely change when he settles. And of course, with God, the man will be squeezed to change, they assume. Change might come for sure but maybe with the man’s fifth wife after he must have messed up your own life. We forget that we didn’t bargain for a post-marriage janitor: we are dealing with an organised God. Of course, He can still change things but the question is at what price? And when?
THE TIME FACTOR
If it’s true that God’s gifts are always to prosper us and never to harm us, why therefore, do some people fringe at the things God freely gives them? Why are some people in disgruntlement and antagonism when God gives them certain gifts at certain times? If we agree that God is the author and finisher of our fate, and is the commander in chief of our destinies, we should at least give Him the authority and benefit of doubt that He knows best what is happening in our lives. He knows best what we need and don’t need and how best to handle the things we have forced upon our lives without His permission. God still allows us give ourselves gifts out of our personal excesses, things we believe are gifts we deserve. Out of His grace, God still gives us the priceless gift of forgiveness to service our broken lives back to heaven-worthiness. That is a gift He gives us even when we least deserve it. Patience, humility and dedication to His word will guide us to discern a gift and anticipate an overdue gift. However, it takes total surrender of a true Christian, one who knows who they are, what they should do at any given point in time and where they are going, to be able to accept the gifts that God brings their way on one hand and to know how to make decent and realistic requests without calling God’s Sacred name in vain. Now is the time to choose who answers our prayer requests. Let’s say we want a realistic but-hard-to-get- Christmas gift: Who can give it to us? Jesus or Santa? It’s our call. Merry Christmas!
LIA
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Irine Lum Asanji (aka LIA) is a freelance writer and journalist based in Brampton, Canada. Born and raised in Cameroon the daughter and sister of Pastors, LIA immigrated to Canada in 2006. She holds an undergraduate degree in Journalism (University of Buea, Cameroon) and a postgraduate degree in Visual Anthropology (University of Tromso, Norway). She has worked as a journalist and Communication Officer with the Presbyterian Church in Cameroon (PCC). LIA recently designed and launched a website talktolia.com geared towards Marriage and Family enrichment services, which serves as her ministry and her private business. She is an employee with Broan-Nutone Canada and became born-again in 2011 making her more evangelistic in her approach to writing. She speaks English, French, German and Norwegian. She is a mother of two and enjoys singing, cooking, dancing and a good laugh. She writes under her name and her pen name LIA which also means Lord Is Able.
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