Questions You Should Ask Yourself This Year
- August 16, 2018
- Irene Mangem
- Posted in Success
(Article first published in DUNIA print magazine, issue 13 as Questions You Should Ask Yourself in 2018)
If you are like me, you have consciously or unconsciously made some promises or resolutions to improve some aspect(s) of your life at the end of each year. What we try to do in making these resolutions is break old habits. However, because they are conditioned behaviors, it’s easy to effortlessly fall back on them.
We can’t change everything at once. That is setting yourself up for failure. Having a bigger picture, keeping it in mind, and setting smaller goals has been more effective for me.
I found out that I could develop positive momentum by linking my goals to current habits. For example, one of my goals is to be a published author in 2018. I have had to curb the habit of chatting with friends during morning hours in order to reach my goal of writing at least two chapters of my book.
We owe it to ourselves to live our greatest life on this earth. We are not waiting for someone else to bring on the change we need.
From my personal experience, I have come up with some questions to challenge you in letting go of what has been holding you back.
CHALLENGE QUESTIONS
1. What Am I Going To Do Differently This Year?
I was used to making the same promises to myself year after year. After going around in so many circles, I realized that I was still at the same spot. It was obvious that I had been doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results. To bring our goals, passions or resolutions to reality, we must take a different approach.
The question is what are you going to do different this year? To answer this question, you must first answer the challenge questions below…
2. Who Am I?
Some of us can still not answer this question and that is the reason why nothing seems to work for us. Knowing and accepting your identity is crucial to your existence and walk on this earth. It is only after I realized that I am a child of God, created for a specific purpose that life began to make sense to me. Even my hurtful past I could now let go because I didn’t want to miss out on finding and fulfilling my purpose on this earth. It was only then that I began to love me, and learning to love ME, opened me up to extending love to others.
It’s very important to get real with yourself. Who Am I? It’s only after genuinely answering this question that you can know what you can become.
3. What Motivates Me?
If you do not know who you are, the usual tendency is that fear motivates you.
For the most part of my life, I was motivated by fear, and anxiety crept in whenever I desired more for myself. After taking active steps to change the course of my future, I can now say, LOVE motivates me.
When love becomes your motive, your resolve is peace. Get into the habit of asking yourself, “what is the motive behind what I’m about to do?”
4. Am I living In The Past?
For most of us, our past experiences have captured us and held us in bondage. We don’t seem to be able to move past disappointments, setbacks or episodes that left us in pain. Unforgiveness and bearing grudges has become our way of trying to cope with the past.
I was in bondage for a greater part of my life. However, when I realized that my past doesn’t define the course of my future, I was relieved. The past wasn’t meant to destroy or break us. The lessons learned have helped me become who I am today.
In 2018, look back to the past only to grab lessons to push you forward.
5. What Do I Want In This Life?
I used to think I was as good as making money to sustain myself and family. Even with that, I wasn’t fulfilled. That’s when I started digging for more. Deep inside of me, I knew that if I could help improve the lives of rejected, abused and underprivileged girls, I would be the happiest and most fulfilled person on earth.
I also had a passion for writing and speaking amongst many others. That’s when I realized I wasn’t where I would love to be. My passion to reach my end destination defeated my fears and I was able to work out strategies and set goals to move me forward.
Today, it is no longer a wish or dream, I’m actively working with girls, speaking and, on the verge of publishing my first memoire and film.
Knowing what you want out of this life is a must if you want to live a fulfilled life on this earth.
Your passions, gifts and talents are all part of your purpose on this earth.
- Discover your passion
- Know how it will make you feel to pursue it
- Understand there will be obstacles and you will find the steps to overcome them
- Set goals and work towards achieving them.
6. What Limiting Beliefs Am I holding Onto?
In my case, I was holding onto unforgiveness, people’s opinions, how society defined me, racial stereotypes, etc. Knowing what holds you back is very essential if you want to move forward in life. Most of us hold onto some cultural or societal norms that have played a role in defining us and the way we see the world around us.
Since the day I found out that the only liberating culture was the culture of LOVE, my life has not been the same. For me, it goes very deep. I was created with love and my existence and purposed is embodied with loving myself, fulfilling my
purpose in life and extending love to others.
Liberating yourself from norms that promote hate or that limit you is a good place to start off 2018.
7. What Company Do You Surround Yourself With?
Most of us are more comfortable around like-minded people. It is said that “your company can either make or break you”. That’s so true.
It was tough for me to leave the very friends who had my back on the streets during my days of homelessness. We had adapted well to surviving the harshness of the streets and by the fifth year, it was becoming our lifestyle. Something inside of me wanted more out of life so I left in pursuit of the unknown. Most of my friends later contracted diseases and some died. The few that dared to leave are doing well today.
“Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are,” they say. Who are the five closest people in your life? Do they bring out the best or the worst in you?
8. Am I Healthy?
For most of us, we define healthy as being alive. I’ve realized that it goes far beyond that.
We often neglect our physical, emotional and mental health. To succeed in this life, we must be physically fit and healthy, emotionally stable and we better be fine ‘upstairs’ (i.e. in our minds).
This year, be determined to take your overall health seriously if you intend to achieve all your dreams and passions.
9. When Is The Last Time I Helped Someone?
“I’ll give back to the poor when I make my first million dollars”, “I don’t give because I’m not there yet”. I hear these so often. As a matter of fact, I once said something like that too.
If you are motivated by love, you’ll realize that wherever you are now, there is something you can offer your employer, neighbor, colleagues, or any person in need, etc.
It’s not always about money. It could be a good service rendered, your smile, a word of encouragement shared, time spent with someone, cash, or whatever your loving heart leads you to do.
Remember, this means you acknowledging that you are already blessed where you are and if I must say it loud, YOU ARE BLESSED TO BE A BLESSING.
Every purpose should be tied to giving back, so let 2018 become your year of more blessings.
May this season renew your heart to get connected with God and may these reflections push you to do things differently this year.
Blessings to you and your precious families.
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- Read | DUNIA Print Magazine – Winter 2017 Edition
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