Ladies’ Exclusive: You, the World and your “Boobs”
By Imane Fawzy Nofal
“Well, women only have breasts for their children and the fact that their husbands might enjoy them later is just because they had enjoyed their mothers’ breasts,” said Catherine, my British friend.
Well, that was shocking to me! For an Eastern, timid woman like me, her direct approach was a bit surprising … and the fact that I am a new mother, still learning about my responsibilities as a mom, the whole concept seemed appalling! Yeah, it opens new gates of responsibility and obligation towards my children. I am trying to be responsible towards them but thinking the way Catherine does has never occurred to me; i.e. that I am biologically and physically obligated and committed to them. Isn’t it a matter of choice? Didn’t God create females this way so that if they chose to be mothers they could decide what to do?
What triggered this discussion was when I brought up – in embarrassment – that my three year old still clings to me and wants to touch my breasts although he was weaned a long time ago. When I was visiting in Egypt a few weeks ago, people got so astonished at his attitude and my mother and mother-in-law gave him the angry eye as if he was committing an evil thing. For me, I had mixed feelings of embarrassment, not knowing how to stop him and not knowing why he is doing this! Deep inside I felt that it is because of the need to be close to me and that is his way of expressing it. Fearing that it might turn into a habit, I always responded either by deterring him or hugging him more. I felt helpless!
“I hate this sexualization!” Catherine said. The term sexualization is such a big word and seems so broad, however, this is so true! The world has become so sexualized in many ways that people’s sights have become blurred. Sexualizing breastfeeding is sick, to me. The mere feeling that a supposedly tender act between a mom and her children is now described in sexual terms shows an increasing trend in these times. Although I am a Muslim and would of course advocate prudence in act and manner, I emphatically refuse such exaggerations and narrow look!
Maybe it’s time to look at what we teach and show our children so that they do not acquire inappropriate sexual information early in life. It is time we do not impose pink on girls and blue on boys. It is about time to implant serious thoughts and ideas into our girls’ minds rather than exposing them to the mamas’ trivial chitchat, so that they grow up dreaming big. It is time where we stop leaving our kids in front of cartoons watching whatever is colorful and moving in front of them. It is time we rebel against trivial movies that include sexy scenes and are void in theme and substance … these poison our children’s minds!
Yes, I am having higher feelings of responsibility towards my kids now; it’s more than just not letting them do things I would consider sex related like putting nail polish on my boys for example, but on the serious level of correcting their outlook of the world and preserving their innocence.
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Imane Fawzy Nofal is a translator, and mother of twin boys. She is an Egyptian who lives in Bahrain and blogs at Express It 2 Live It. Imane regularly shares her thoughts on human interactions and real life issues on DUNIA through her column Express it by Imane.
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