“Communities must reject the notion that family violence is a private matter and instead treat it as the urgent social issue it is.”
By Tabassum Zannat Easha
Violence within the family, whether directed towards a spouse or a child, is one of the most damaging realities that can exist in a home. It leaves deep wounds that are not always visible but that shape lives in ways that often remain unspoken.
In our South Asian societies, conversations about domestic violence and child abuse are often silenced, brushed aside as private matters, or dismissed as normal discipline. Such normalization not only perpetuates the harm but also deprives victims of the support and justice they deserve.
Child abuse is among the most heartbreaking forms of violence. It affects a child’s physical health, emotional well-being, and ability to trust the world around them.
In many households, physical punishment is seen as a tool for discipline, even when it crosses into cruelty. Parents, burdened with personal frustrations or unresolved conflicts, sometimes direct their anger towards their children, not because the child has committed any serious wrongdoing, but simply because they are vulnerable and cannot resist. I have personally witnessed situations where a crying infant was met not with comfort, but with shouting and blows, simply because the sound (of their crying) disturbed an exhausted parent. In other cases, a mother’s frustration with her in-laws, or a father’s resentments from work pressures were taken out on their children. Such acts leave invisible scars that can haunt a person for a lifetime.
Domestic violence between adults in the household compounds this tragedy. When a child grows up witnessing one parent abusing another, whether physically, verbally, or emotionally, it sends a dangerous message: that violence is a normal part of relationships.
Research shows that children exposed to such environments are more likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, and difficulty forming healthy relationships. Some may even replicate the patterns of abuse they have witnessed, perpetuating the cycle across generations. In extreme cases, both child abuse and domestic violence can escalate to fatal outcomes, driven by greed, anger, or deep-seated resentments.
The long-term effects of violence are profound. Charles Dickens captured this poignantly in Great Expectations:
“In the little world in which children have their existence, whosoever brings them up, there is nothing so finely perceived and so finely felt as injustice.”
Children know when they are being treated unfairly; they feel the sting of humiliation and betrayal deeply. The injustice they experience at home shapes their understanding of trust, safety, and love.
Breaking this cycle requires more than just stricter laws, it demands a shift in cultural attitudes. Parents must understand that discipline is not synonymous with fear, and love cannot coexist with abuse. Communities must reject the notion that family violence is a private matter and instead treat it as the urgent social issue it is. Every child has the right to grow up in an environment free from fear, and every adult has the right to live without violence from those they love.
I read somewhere that: “Every child deserves a parent, but not every parent deserves a child.” Until we face this truth, the silent suffering within our homes will continue, leaving behind generations shaped by pain rather than by care.
Tabassum Zannat Easha is an emerging writer and researcher from Dhaka, Bangladesh. A graduate of Dhaka International University with a B.A. (Hons) in English, she is now pursuing an MA in English at East West University, with interests in literary studies, critical theory, and translation.
